How to Conduct Performance Reviews Like a World-Class Leader
(Without Losing the Human Touch)
Let’s be honest — the words performance review rarely inspire joy.
For many employees, it feels like walking into an evaluation they didn’t design, where they brace for criticism or wonder if they’ve done enough. And for many managers? It’s often an awkward box-ticking exercise, wedged between meetings, delivered with a stiff script and corporate tone.
But it doesn’t have to be that way.
The best leaders know that a performance review isn’t about catching people out — it’s about building people up.
It’s not an interrogation. Instead, it’s a conversation.
And when it’s done well, it becomes one of the most powerful tools for connection, growth, and long-term retention.
Start with Connection, Not Correction with your Performance Reviews
Before you jump into objectives or metrics, pause.
This is a human being in front of you — not a project plan. So warm up the conversation. Build rapport. Invite them into the space.
You can start with something like:
“Before we dive in, how would you like to approach this today?”
“What would you love to walk away with from our time together?”
You’re signaling psychological safety and making space for openness and honesty! You’re showing you care not just about what they did, but how they felt doing it.
Reframe the Review as a Growth Conversation
Most people go into reviews judging themselves. That’s the nature of how we’re wired. We replay what we didn’t do, what we missed, what we could’ve done better.
So be the leader who balances the scales.
Make it clear this isn’t a grilling. Frame it as an opportunity to reflect on what worked, what challenged them, and what they learned. Even if they didn’t hit every milestone — what insights did they gain?
Here’s a way to share your intent:
“My outcome is to understand more about how you approached your work, how I can support you better, and where you might want coaching or development moving forward.”
Try making it a two-way exchange. Invite your own stretch:
“I’ve been working on being a better listener in meetings — I’d love your input on how I’m doing too.”
Invite Ownership and Curiosity
Here are a few questions that can make the conversation richer:
- What part of your role do you love most right now?
- What would you like to do more of?
- Where do you feel you’ve grown the most?
- What’s one thing that would make your role easier or more enjoyable?
By asking these, you turn the review into an exploration, not a defence.
You’ll hear more than performance updates — you’ll get insight into motivation, drive, and direction.
For Those On a Performance Plan — Keep Humanity at the Centre
If someone is on a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP), the stakes feel higher.
Even so, you can still lead with dignity.
Don’t use the plan to edge someone out. Use it as a tool to clarify expectations, give real coaching, and build a path forward that feels possible — not punitive.
Try to avoid language that feels like a verdict. Instead, be specific, fair, and supportive. And make sure you’re not setting them up with goals they can’t achieve without guidance.
Always remember: if someone’s struggling, it might not be lack of effort — it might be lack of clarity or support.
Stories I’ve Heard in Coaching
Over the years, I’ve coached many people who still carry the weight of poorly handled performance reviews. Conversations that felt more like character assessments than opportunities to grow. Words that stung, rather than sparked progress.
People describe reviews that were rushed, misinformed, and at times, deeply unfair. There were outcomes that felt pre-decided. And goals that were vague, with a tone that was unnecessarily harsh. One client shared how the review made them question their entire value to the company — even though their results said otherwise.
This is where coaching steps in. It helps people process the story they’ve been given, and replace it with something more truthful and helpful.
If you’re a manager, remember: reviews stay with people.
Lead them with care.
What About the Employee? (Yes, This Is For You Too)
If you’re on the receiving end of a review — know that you have a say.
Come prepared. Reflect on your growth. Be honest. And if the conversation feels like it’s heading into critique-only territory, you can steer it back:
“Can I share what I’ve been learning through that challenge?”
“Here’s what I’m working on and where I’d love some feedback.”
Reviews aren’t one-sided. Bring your voice in. Own your value. And be open to where you can improve — not from shame, but from a desire to grow.
The Best Performance Reviews Come From Self-Aware Leaders
If there’s one thing I’ve learned after 20 years of coaching, it’s this:
The best performance reviews don’t come from a checklist. They come from self-aware leaders who’ve walked the path. Leaders who listen more than they talk. Leaders who remember what it felt like to sit on the other side of the table.
These leaders are mindful of tone, aware of their own triggers, and committed to leaving the person better than they found them.
So whether you’re giving the review or receiving one — bring your humanity.
Ask real questions. Give real feedback. And build a shared map for where you’re going next.
Performance reviews don’t have to be dreaded. They can be the beginning of something better.
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Learn more about the executive coach behind this article, based in Dublin and coaching globally
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